Five guys to NEVER date in college

BY VALENTINA CAVAL

Editor-in-Chief

The best years of your life — also known as college — should be spent single and ready to mingle. But if you cannot last four years without your hand being held, follow the rules.

The following guys are rated NOT dateable for the females on campus.

These are the five guys ladies should never slip their number to. NEVER. Don’t say you were not warned.

The ONE who teaches your class:

I blame this one on Hollywood. I know we have all seen it in the movies, but let us not date our professors. Lucky for us, ESU Professors — no offense — are not exactly the biggest hunks. Either way, the “A” is not worth the reputation, and the baggage they probably come with.

Walk out of the classroom, and NEVER go for this guy.

Side Note: These guys do provide you with excellent advice for your future, but keep it professional.

The ONE who is not over his EX:

Do not be a part of the on and off rollercoaster. He honestly will not choose you.

History has the tendency to triumph in relationships. If he really loves her, he always will. Do not settle for second best.

Let him live in the past, but do not live there with him. NEVER go for this guy.

Side Note: These guys need a break. They are in love and you should never hate them for that just because it is not with you.

The ONE who sells the “party favors”:

Unless you look good in orange and like the thought of romancing in a jail cell, you should probably not take this risk.

You might be willing to do anything for love, but do not do that. His attractive bad boy attitude will fade just as quickly as his IQ points did.

Enjoy your freedom, and NEVER date this guy.

Side Note: These guys are useless.

The ONE who loves you after your first drink:

Bring back the Jersey Shore because there is a stage five clinger in the house.

There is not a whole lot worse than a guy who does not love you — except a guy who loves you too much.

The overly sensitive guy who calls you beautiful and amazing every five minutes is only cute for those five minutes.

Go ahead and give him a chance, and then have fun waking up to 17 text messages when you did not answer the first one.

Do not risk having a stalker; NEVER go for this guy.

Side Note: These guys make GREAT friends and will pick you up when you are down — as long as he doesn’t whine too much about being in the “friend-zone.”

The ONE who cannot commit:

No, you are not different. No, you will not change him. Let the man do his thing.

Seriously, if he is bringing a different girl home every single night, give him props and walk away.

If you are looking for something that results in breakfast and morning cuddles you are in the wrong room — all you are going to find with him is a walk of shame.

Save yourself the awkward walk across the quad and NEVER go for this guy.

Side Note: These guys make excellent wingmen and will be the first to tell you when a guy is just not into you. Yes he’s a player, but it takes one to know one — and he can point them out to you.

 

The good news is, everyone else is all yours for the taking– the guy at the gym, the cute guy on your floor, even the one guy you met at Phi Sig, they are all better for you than the guys on this list.

Email Valentina at:

vc7521@live.esu.edu