Ask Becca: Feb. 18, 2016

By Rebecca Rue
Staff Writer

*Sending advice your way to deal with your dates, deadlines, and dorm mates every week*

Dear Becca,

My roommate repeatedly enters my room without permission. I have addressed this with him face to face but it still happens when I’m not home. What should I do?

Sincerely,
Room Invasion

Dear Room Invasion,

First, I just want to say that I am sorry you are in such a rough position.
No one goes to college wishing that this will be their experience.

My first point of advice would be to talk to your roommate one more time if you can.

Give him one more chance to hear what you are saying before it goes further.

It could click for him this time that you are very serious since it is being brought up again in conversation.

Maybe you can both agree on a set of house rules?

At the end of the day however, it all depends on what you are comfortable with doing and saying.

If keeping this between you continues to go nowhere, you really should take your complaint elsewhere.

Go talk to your RA. They can work with you to do what is needed to find a resolution.

Good luck. I truly hope this situation gets resolved peacefully.

Dear Becca,

I love my boyfriend but his family does not. I have always tried my hardest to be respectful to his parents, yet I always come to find that I am un-liked and I don’t know why. What should I do?

Sincerely,
Coping with My Partner’s Parents

Dear Coping with My Partner’s Parents,

Wow. Talk about being stuck between a rock and a hard place.

Kudos to you for not giving up.

First, keep doing what you are doing, by being respectful and putting in the effort to make sure that you will get along with his family.

That is very important. Otherwise the situation will go downhill for all of you very fast.

Second, I advise finding out some of their interests.

What do they like regarding books, television, movies, etc?

Maybe you can read up on, or participate in, some of the things that they are interested in.

Then you guys can bond over conversations and activities regarding them.

Another action that you can take is to invite them over for dinner.

Make the effort to bring them into your lives in this way, and show them that they are important.

Lastly, depending on what you are comfortable with, you can talk to them about their issues with you.

Maybe a direct conversation is all that is needed to help resolve problems, or to connect to each other in a new way.

However, in the end, the most essential thing to remember is your relationship.

His family might never understand or accept you together, but they don’t need to.

He is choosing to be with you for a reason, and that is all that matters.

*Hey there East Stroudsburg University Students! Have an issue that you need help with? Send your questions my way, and check out my advice column every week to see if your question has been chosen!*

Email Becca at:
rrue@live.esu.edu

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