Ask Becca: Nov. 10, 2016

Rebecca Rue
Opinion Editor

*Sending advice your way to deal with your dates, deadlines and dorm mates every week*

Dear Becca,

This is mine and my boyfriend’s first semester in college, and I miss him so much. Lately, I have been considering transferring to his school next year to be with him, but I don’t know what to do. Can you give me some advice?

Sincerely,
Long Distance Blues

Dear Long Distance Blues,

I can only imagine how hard it must be to be in a long distance relationship while you are dealing with your studies.

Switching schools is a major consideration.

For you, it can be better or worse for your future depending on your own situation.

I realize this might be hard, but take your boyfriend completely out of the picture so you first can decide what is the best thing for you.

What is your major? Is what you have chosen for yourself so far something that you are choosing to stick with?

Once you have that answer, start your research.

Go to the school’s website and see what they offer.

Call your department of interest and speak to someone that can give you even more information.

Next, consider your financial standing.

Do you live on campus? Are you a commuter student?

Based on financial aid and help you receive from your parents, can you even afford to go to this other school?

I sincerely hope you keep in mind that your education is for you and your future. No one else.

What you do and don’t accomplish here will affect your life drastically, so I want you to give this decision the weight it deserves.

Good luck!

Dear Becca,

I get along with my roommate so well. I couldn’t imagine living with anyone else. However, this semester, through other friends, we met this guy that we both like and I am panicking. She doesn’t realize how I feel yet, and I don’t know what to do. Can you give me some advice?

Sincerely,
Three’s a Crowd

Dear Three’s a Crowd,

I am so sorry, I wouldn’t wish this situation on anyone.

This might not be something that you want to hear, but you need to consider what relationship is more important to you because it could come down to that choice.

After you have thought through how you feel, and you know exactly where you stand, you need to talk to her.

The best way to head off a conflict is to be clear, direct and honest.

If you need to write out your thoughts beforehand, do so. The last thing that you want to happen is for your feelings and points to get lost in a fight.

Even if the conversation itself upsets your roommate, she will appreciate that you respect her enough to be honest with her.

I truly hope that you both can work through this and continue to be there for one another.

Email Becca at:
rrue@live.esu.edu