By Rebecca Rue
*Sending advice your way to deal with your dates, deadlines, and dorm mates every week*
My best friend and I got into a major fight a couple of days ago. We were both right and wrong, and we both said things that we shouldn’t have. I am very lost on how to fix this. Can you help me?
At a Loss for Words
Dear At a Loss for Words,
Wow. I am so sorry, and I hope you guys are able to get past this in the end.
First up, before you even try to talk to your friend, you should spend some serious time thinking over everything that happened.
How did you both get to this point? What was said on either side exactly? What was the point that you were making and what was theirs? Is there anything that you realized the significance of after your anger faded?
I have always found it easier to take my time and gather my thoughts in these occurrences. Then I write out what I want to say to the other person at my own pace while looking at the situation from all the angles, including the other person’s viewpoint if I can.
Even if writing does not come as easy to you and you do not wish to do so, just taking the time to figure out where you stand could be beneficial for you in the end. This allows you to sort out all of it calmly while you are not at risk of fighting more.
Once you are prepared, then you can feel confident in your own knowledge of where you are at, and proud of the effort you have already made.
Finally, approach your friend and see where you guys are at. Try to fix any lingering anger and other issues if at all possible.
Good luck. I really hope it all works out.
I am a writer myself and have work that I feel somewhat confident in. I want to submit it, and I want to write other things in different areas to gain more experience as well. But the problem is that I allow my own fear to hold me back. Is there any advice that you can give me?
Dear Self-Esteem Deprived,
I completely understand, and I am sure you would be hard pressed to find someone who did not feel the same way as you at some point or another.
The hard part is letting go. Have you taken your time with your work to both compose it and edit to the best of your ability? That is all you can do.
Just last semester, I was afraid of writing for the paper because I was not sure I would be any good at it. Now, I am grateful for putting myself out there because I sincerely enjoy writing this column.
As far as my own creative writing, I have received rejections and criticisms, but that is a part of being a writer. Anyone that creates something for the enjoyment of others has no choice but to handle the opinions of others.
I know this is easier said than done, but the only way you will find out your own skill level as an author is to throw yourself out there.
Just try. You never know where the decision to do so can lead you.
*Hey there East Stroudsburg University Students! Have an issue that you need help with? Send your questions my way, and check out my advice column every week to see if your question has been chosen!*
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