Ask Becca: Nov. 17, 2016

Rebecca Rue
Opinion Editor

*Sending advice your way to deal with your dates, deadlines and dorm mates every week*

Dear Becca,

When the election was called last week, I started to feel anxious about my Thanksgiving holiday with my family.

They are predominantly Trump supporters, and I am not. I worry that when I see them, they are going to try to force their own views upon me, which is something that I can’t handle right now.

Our break from school is minimal, and I have a lot of schoolwork on my plate to finish before we go back. I don’t have time to be upset and distracted.

Can you give me any advice?

Sincerely,
Concerned and Apprehensive

Dear Concerned and Apprehensive,

Don’t worry, you aren’t alone. Unease about the family holidays is common among students from what I have seen over the past week.

Realization, at least for me, of what Trump’s win meant for our time with our families didn’t truly hit until the results were announced.

I am personally anti-Trump, and certain members of my family feel the opposite.

I spent days stressing over what that would mean for my holiday, especially since, like you, I don’t have time to waste on anything besides turkey and final papers.

The solution that my family agreed upon can possibly work for you.

Is there any way for you and your family to have a conversation about this without it turning into a fight?

Only you know if anyone is too temperamental or stubborn to have a compromising discussion about politics.

A conversation where both sides resolve to keep calm and really attempt to see things from the other side of the line.

If you know this is impossible, like I did, then talk to your family.

Ask them, as politely as you can, for the family to agree on a ban of politics for the duration of the holidays.

Express that you know how they feel, and they know how you feel, and the only two options are a huge fight, or not talking about it at all.

You choose the latter, and you won’t stick around for a political discussion war.

Whether they agree or not, if the conversation does turn sour, utilize any options at your disposal to remove yourself from the situation.

If you have a car, you can drive to a friend’s house or anywhere you feel comfortable.

If you don’t have a car and there’s no one that can pick you up, relocate somewhere inside or outside the house, where you can calm down and so can they.

If your family responds poorly to your suggestion, then you should seriously consider other options, like going to a friend’s to celebrate, or possibly a significant other’s.

You should never have to listen to anyone berate you for your beliefs.

Most importantly, however, remember that the vice versa applies to you. Whether you can understand where your family is coming from or not, make sure your interactions with them are above reproach.

You only have complete control of what you do, say, and think.

Good luck!

Email Becca At:
rrue@live.esu.edu

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